Why Integrity Wins

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

Hey y’all, welcome back to Leilani’s Couch—your quick shot of real talk and motivation. I’m Leilani Anderson-Monroe, and today we’re talking about something that, honestly, just sits at the core of every win, every loss, every relationship, every dollar: integrity. Now, Warren Buffett—you know, the guy who’s basically the blueprint for building real generational wealth—he has this one rule. He always says the key to success isn’t just being smart or having hustle, but working with people who’ve got integrity. He’s like, you can be clever, you can be ambitious, but if you don’t have that base layer of honesty and strong character? It all falls apart real quick. And that is so, so real.

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

Think about it. You could have the best idea, the dopest pitch, the hardest work ethic—but if you’re aligning with people who cut corners or twist the truth when it’s convenient, all that energy comes crashing down. It’s wild, because sometimes on the outside, things can look perfect, but something behind the scenes just doesn’t feel right. Maybe you’ve seen it yourself… or maybe you haven’t noticed until it’s too late.

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

Let me tell you about a real estate deal I had a while back. Now, I might mess up some of the details—I always mess up if it was a Thursday or a Friday!—but what stuck was the lesson. We had a buyer and a seller, everything was moving smooth, but there was one partner involved who would tell you one thing on the phone… then behind your back, do something else. Just little things at first—changing dates, not looping people in—but I felt it deep in my gut. Long story short? The deal fell apart hard, people lost trust, and somebody’s reputation took a real hit. It wasn’t about one big lie, it was those little cracks. That’s what happens without integrity. It won’t work. People get manipulative—sometimes on purpose, sometimes that’s just how they operate. But either way, it breaks things down. Honestly, that experience taught me: I don’t care how smart or talented you are. If I can’t trust you, I don’t want you in business with me, period.

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

So, let’s get practical—’cause I’m not about just talking in circles. How do you spot integrity before it’s too late? Whether it’s in business, in friendships, even the people you date, you gotta know what to look for. And I’ll tell you, sometimes it’s not what people say, it’s what they do when nobody’s clapping.

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

In my world, real integrity looks like people keeping their word, even on the small stuff. If someone says, “I’ll email you that doc tonight,” and then they do? Or even better, if they mess up and actually own it—“Hey, I forgot, but let me fix it. My bad.” I pay attention to that stuff way more than what’s on someone’s resume or LinkedIn page, honestly. And Warren Buffett has this thing too—he’ll watch how someone treats folks who can’t do anything for them. You know? Like, how they talk to an assistant or the person serving coffee in a meeting. That’s the blueprint for real character.

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

Now, there’s always some red flags—let’s keep it real. People who overpromise and underdeliver, folks who are quick to gossip or play those “little” manipulative games, that’s a no for me. Like, I’ve been at networking events and you can spot it—the person trying to be everywhere at once, saying whatever people want to hear, but you never really know where they stand. As Buffett says, intelligence and ambition are great, but if you see any pattern of dishonesty, just run. If somebody’s comfortable being shady for something small, they’ll do worse when it really matters. Believe me.

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

Maybe you’re wondering, “How do you actually test for integrity early on?” That’s a good question. I don’t think there’s a checklist, but I’ll ask folks little things like, “What’s your process when you make a mistake?” Or “Who do you go to when things get sticky?” People with real integrity—man, they don’t get defensive, they get honest. As for whether you can teach integrity? Whew. I mean, skills—yes. But integrity...that’s a little deeper. I think people can grow, but only if they want to. You can’t force it. You can show it, you can model it, but you can’t teach what someone refuses to learn. That’s just my two cents.

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

Okay, now let’s flip it—how do you become a person known for integrity? ’Cause at the end of the day, as much as you wanna find it in others, you gotta build it into yourself, every single day. And honestly, it’s in the tiny habits—keeping your promises, showing up, admitting when you drop the ball. Integrity is like a muscle; you practice, it gets stronger. Even small stuff matters, like returning a call when you said you would—people remember that.

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

I’ve seen entrepreneurs lose everything on one bad decision—maybe trying to save their ego or their image—but I’ve also watched people earn massive respect and open new doors just by telling the truth, even when it hurt in the short term. That moment of, “Hey, I messed up and I’m gonna make it right”? That travels farther than any resume or highlight reel.

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

And I’ll tell y’all, I’ve been there, too. There was one time in my Boss Women Network—a space I created to be nothing but real—where somebody started moving a little funny, doing things behind the group’s back. The easy thing would’ve been to sweep it under the rug and keep things smooth, but that didn’t feel right. So eventually I called it out, respectfully but directly. Some people were uncomfortable; However ,they did not appreciate that honesty. It actually made our community separate. My moto is if you’re here, you’re gonna be held to a standard. And that makes trust real. Many people have a different view on that. It was to a point I did not know how more transparent I could be. That's why integrity matters. When everyone has real integrity in every aspect of their lives, then things align how they should.

Leilani Anderson-Monroe

So that’s today’s word: Integrity isn’t a buzzword, y’all—it’s the anchor. It’s what keeps you steady in business, in relationships, in your own personal growth. It might cost you small things in the moment, but it’ll pay out tenfold over time. If you’re looking to win for the long haul, bet on integrity every time. And if you gotta start small, start with the next promise you make—keep it, even if it’s just to yourself. That’s how the wins start to stack up.